Anger and grief love to dance together.

Anger is a dance you do with grief. Is anger just your emotions coming out when there is no other way to express them in the moment? It seems to come out of nowhere and without warning. I can feel my anger building in my mind when I think about loss. All my losses have spoken loudly through unchecked anger. I’m not sure this is the best way to express sadness and rage, but logic is gone. Logic is a liar. Logic tells me that you don’t bury your child, you don’t get sick and have your plans swept away. See logic is a liar. There are no “rules” or formula on how life is supposed to go. The American Dream turns into a nightmare of physical and emotional suffering. It’s exhausting to keep dancing with anger. How do you move past this intense emotion and fill the void of loss with something less volatile? I have to wonder if holding all my unchecked anger in my body was a contributing factor to my colon “explosion”. It had to go somewhere so maybe it decided to leave my body by blowing my colon apart?

Who am I? Anger changes the way I see myself.

Stop the mind movie……Change the channel…….rewrite the ending……. Allow yourself to be happy………. It is okay to not carry the heavy burden….

If I set down this heavy load, will I be setting down the memory of my loved ones? It is accepting that it’s okay that life isn’t what I had planned?

Is holding on so tightly going to bring back what I have lost…..NO.

Is it time to dig myself out?

Anger and grief love to dance together.

Fear is not in failing, fear is in succeeding.

Creativity helps to explore feelings.